Happy New Year, Superheroes!

I've wanted to do this weird little post for a while now and today seems like the perfect day.

What are your Superhero powers? Let me tell you where I'm coming from with this - I've always imagined that if aliens or terrorists took over our country/state/city/planet, I'd need some sort of super skills to cope. I can't run very fast or jump very high, but there are things I can do that would come in handy. These are my superpowers.

I am like a camel in that I can hold my pee for long periods of time. I've trained myself to not get up at night. This wouldn't really help me if aliens were attacking, but at least I wouldn't have to pee myself to stay hidden.

I'm pretty good with the whole flirting/seduction thing. I'm sure I'm quite rusty as it's been years, but I could probably infiltrate the bad guys with my feminine wiles.

I can move a crowd quickly. If the aliens/terrorists were coming, this might be helpful to force people along to a safe place. When I was a flight attendant, we had to be able to clear a plane in 90 seconds. I can do that.

I can direct water very well. When I turn on the water in the tub in the morning, I grab handfuls and shoot the water at stray pieces of hair or soap to flush them down to the drain. I am pretty damn accurate. This would only help me if the aliens were the kind in that Mel Gibson movie that were averse to water. Still.

So, what are your superpowers? And, obviously, they don't have to be real superpowers. Just whatever skills you have that would keep you alive (or at least not pissing yourself) if the bad guys were coming after you.

Movie Resume Meme

Objective: To utilize my movie-watching skills for the betterment of mankind.

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show (x) Grease (x) Pirates of the Caribbean ( ) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest ( ) Boondock Saints (x) Fight Club ( ) Starsky and Hutch ( ) Neverending Story (x) Blazing Saddles ( ) Universal Soldier ( ) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events ( ) Along Came Polly ( ) Joe Dirt (x) King Kong ( ) A Cinderella Story ( ) The Terminal ( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie ( ) Passport to Paris (x) Dumb & Dumber ( ) Dumber & Dumberer ( ) Final Destination ( ) Final Destination 2 ( ) Final Destination 3 (x) Halloween (x) The Ring ( ) The Ring 2 ( ) Surviving Christmas ( ) Flubber (orignal only) ( ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle (x) Practical Magic ( ) Chicago ( ) Ghost Ship ( ) From Hell (x) Hellboy (x) Secret Window ( ) I Am Sam ( ) The Whole Nine Yards ( ) The Whole Ten Yards (x) The Day After Tomorrow ( ) Child's Play ( ) Seed of Chucky ( ) Bride of Chucky ( ) Ten Things I Hate About You ( ) Just Married ( ) Gothika (x) Nightmare on Elm Street (x) Sixteen Candles (x) Remember the Titans ( ) Coach Carter ( ) The Grudge ( ) The Grudge 2 (x) The Mask ( ) Son Of The Mask (x) Bad Boys ( ) Bad Boys 2 ( ) Joy Ride ( ) Lucky Number Sleven (x) Ocean's Eleven (x) Ocean's Twelve (x) Bourne Identity (x) Bourne Supremacy ( ) Lone Star ( ) Bedazzled (original only) ( ) Predator I ( ) Predator II ( ) The Fog ( ) Ice Age ( ) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown ( ) Curious George (x) Independence Day (x) Cujo ( ) A Bronx Tale ( ) Darkness Falls (x) Christine (x) ET ( ) Children of the Corn ( ) My Bosses Daughter ( ) Maid in Manhattan (x) War of the Worlds (x) Rush Hour ( ) Rush Hour 2 ( ) Best Bet ( ) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days ( ) She's All That ( ) Calendar Girls (x) Sideways (x) Mars Attacks ( ) Event Horizon (x) Ever After (x) Wizard of Oz (x) Forrest Gump (x) Big Trouble in Little China (x) The Terminator (x) The Terminator 2 (x) The Terminator 3 (x) X-Men (x) X2 (x) X-3 (x) Spider-Man (x) Spider-Man 2 ( ) Sky High ( ) Jeepers Creepers ( ) Jeepers Creepers 2 ( ) Catch Me If You Can (x) The Little Mermaid (x) Freaky Friday (original only) ( ) Reign of Fire ( ) The Skulls (x) Cruel Intentions ( ) Cruel Intentions 2 ( ) The Hot Chick	(x) Shrek (x) Shrek 2 ( ) Swimfan (x) Miracle on 34th street ( ) Old School ( ) The Notebook ( ) K-Pax ( ) Kippendorf's Tribe ( ) A Walk to Remember (x) Ice Castles ( ) Boogeyman (x) The 40-year-old-virgin (x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring (x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers (x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King (x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark (x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade ( ) Baseketball ( ) Hostel ( ) Waiting for Guffman ( ) House of 1000 Corpses ( ) Devils Rejects ( ) Elf (x) Highlander ( ) Mothman Prophecies ( ) American History X ( ) Three ( ) The Jacket (X) Kung Fu Hustle ( ) Shaolin Soccer ( ) Night Watch (x) Monsters Inc. (x) Titanic (x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail (x) Shaun Of the Dead ( ) Willard ( ) High Tension ( ) Club Dread (x) Hulk ( ) Dawn of the Dead (x) Hook ( ) Chronicles Of Narnia ( ) 28 days later ( ) Orgazmo ( ) Phantasm ( ) Waterworld (x) Kill Bill vol 1 (x) Kill Bill vol 2 ( ) Mortal Kombat ( ) Wolf Creek ( ) Kingdom of Heaven ( ) the Hills Have Eyes ( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman (x) The Last House on the Left ( ) Re-Animator ( ) Army of Darkness (x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace ( ) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones ( ) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith (x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope (x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back (x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi ( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage ( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor (x) The Matrix (x) The Matrix Reloaded (x) The Matrix Revolutions ( ) Animatrix ( ) Evil Dead ( ) Evil Dead 2 (x) Team America: World Police (x) Red Dragon (x) Silence of the Lambs (x) Hannibal ( ) Battle Royale ( ) Battle Royale 2 (x) Brazil (x) Contact (x) Cube ( ) Dr. Strangelove ( ) Enlightenment Guaranteed ( ) Four Rooms ( ) Memento ( ) Pi ( ) Requiem for a Dream (x) Pulp Fiction (x) Reservoir Dogs ( ) Run Lola Run ( ) Russian Ark (x) Serenity (x) Sin City (x) Snatch ( ) Spider (x) The Sixth Sense ( ) The Village ( ) Waking Life ( ) Zatoichi ( ) Ikiru ( ) The Seven Samurai ( ) Brick ( ) Akira

There are some true classics that I have not seen. That's a damn shame. But we have many, many movies in our queueueueueueue, so we'll get there. Tropic Thunder is next!

My Birthday Present to Myself

Yesterday I bought tickets to go see the Pogues at the Roseland Ballroom in New York City. I can't even tell you how excited I am.

Woohoo! Or, I Love a Meme!

This is from the god known as kona.

1. Five names you go by:

* Tracy Lee
* Tray
* Wifée
* Santolos
* DIL

2. Three things you are wearing right now:

* pink butter socks (that's what I call those fleece things)
* pink snowflake lounge pants
* white butter shirt

3. Two things you want very badly at the moment:

* sleep
* another vacation

4. Three people who will probably fill this out:

* Toast
* 'shift
* Mish

5. Two things you did last night:

* read a chapter of The Lord of the Rings
* made sloppy joes for dinner

6. Two things you ate today:

* Roqamole dip (guacamole with roquefort cheese)
* celery with peanut butter and raisins

7. Two people you last talked to on the phone:

* bank customer #1
* Toast

8. Two things you are going to do tomorrow:

* put up and decorate the Xmas tree
* find a place to watch the Jets play

9. Two longest car rides:

* from Easthampton, MA to Commerce, GA to NOLA to San Antonio, TX to Carlsbad, NM to Flagstaff, AZ to New River, AZ to Bakersfield, CA to Sunnydale, CA to LA, CA to Phoenix, AZ and then finally settling in LV, NV
* from Weatogue, CT to New Jersey to Outer Banks, NC to St. Augustine, FL to Key West to Ft. Lauderdale, FL to Savannah, GA back to Weatogue, CT

10. Two of your favorite beverages: (see #5?)

* Coca Cola decaf
* margarita (good tequila buzz and salt - can't be beat)

And finally: a clip from my favorite movie:



Gotta love a easy meme and a visit with your favorite movie. Peace.

I Love Living Near ESPN

I just met Kenny Mayne at the grocery store! That is so cool. He's very nice and I shook his hand and blabbered about how much I love his "Dance Center" segments and how my husband says that Sportscenter with KO was some of the best sports television ever. Woohoo!

Tart's Right - WTF is a Fly Name?

I first saw this at kona's site and followed it back to this Phydeaux phellow. I'm glad someone tagged me. Thanks, baby. And thanks for having me do the meme, too. Looks like fun!

1. Witness Protection Program Name (mother’s & father’s middle names): Marie Lee

2. NASCAR Name (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad): Thomas Chester (although I personally like Chester Thomas better)

3. Star Wars Name (the first 2 letters of your last name, first 4 letters of your first name): Satrac

4. Detective Name (favorite color, favorite animal): Azure Housecat

5. Soap Opera Name (middle name, city where you live): Lee Weatogue or Lee Simsbury (Weatogue is a borough of Simsbury)

6. Superhero Name (2nd favorite color, favorite alcoholic drink, optionally add "THE" to the beginning): The Orange Margarita

7. Fly (?) Name (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name): Tros (with my maiden name, it would be Tron)

8. Gangsta Name (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite cookie): Chocolate Almond Chip Fig Newton (that's a fucking terrible gangsta name - as a matter of fact, I can't think of a good ice cream/cookie combination that would make a good gangsta name)

9. Rock Star Name (current pet’s name, current street name): Ozzie Colonial

10. Porn Name (1st pet, street you grew up on): Pepper Kenwood

Yeehah! I tag all the Toasters who have not yet done this. I'm looking forward to all of you doing it. You know who you are.

Five Things About Me

I've been tagged by konagod for a meme! Cool! And flattering.

Apparently this is 5 things people may find interesting about me. Okay.

1. I have tried out for Jeopardy, Who Wants To Be a Millionaire and The Price Is Right (where you actually just go there, you don't audition or anything). I'd love to be on a game show and win money just for knowing things. But apparently, I didn't know enough. ;-)
2. In high school, a friend became hysterically pregnant with my baby. Yeah, I got a girl pregnant. Pretty freaky. She was a good friend who had had a fucked up childhood and wasn't very emotionally healthy. Anyhoo, she went to a few doctors with symptoms of pregnancy. The third finally sent her to a shrink, who figured out her issue. Chicks have always kinda dug me.
3. When I was 18, I registered to vote at school. As a Republican. It's what Ayn would've wanted. A little later in life, I changed to a Libertarian as I thought government should get out of peoples' personal lives. I didn't really understand Libertarianism very well. Now I'm home - a registered Democrat. We can't just let the poor in this country die because they don't have health care or food or heat. And who is supposed to take care of them? All of us. Society. E pluribus unum. Much different answer from when I was 18.
4. When I was a gangly, awkward teenager entering puberty (I was a bit of a late bloomer) who thought that dressing up meant wearing a sweater with your jeans instead of a T-shirt, my parents sent me to the Barbizon School of Modeling hoping it would up my girl skillz. I learned how to put on makeup and how to take off my jacket gracefully while walking down a runway, but this stuff didn't translate into real life like the rents and I had hoped (although girlfriend can sashay in some heels). I was still gawky and socially clueless. But I was a happy girl, so who cares?
5. I've probably had more than 50 jobs. When I was younger, if I didn't like a job or a boss, I left. I was never disrespectful - I always gave a two-week notice and fulfilled it to the best of my ability, but I couldn't understand staying where I wasn't happy. Now I've got a job that I like about 50% of the time. But, hey, I've got a husband and a house and a mortgage and health insurance. Life gets so complicated when you get older. :)

I think those things are relatively interesting. I hope I haven't let kona down. And now I tag Toast, Chemist, maurinsky, nightshift and all the Howards.

Mil Mascaras!

This one's for the ladies.

I don't wear a lot of makeup. I'll put lipstick on if I'm going out and I'll wear mascara to work. But because I only partake of these two, I'm really picky about what I use.

In the past few years, I have tried 3 or 4 mascaras ranging in price from $10 to $24. I'll buy it, try it for a few weeks (I generally don't reject things right away - it's only fair to give them a little bit of a chance), then move on if I'm not happy. Frustrating.

Then I found the Lash Stash from Sephora! Woohoo! Seven different mascara samples for $35! Woohoo I say!

I got to try Benefit A Little Bad Gal Lash, Blinc Kiss Me Mascara, Lorac Publicity Stunt Lashes, Smashbox Bionic Mascara, Stila Multi-Effect Mascara, Sephora Lash Plumper and Too Faced Lash Injection. Some very good names there, along with some very different styles (The Blinc mascara coats your lashes in a series of tubes!).

My criteria for mascaras is good coverage in least amount of coats (preferably one), lash separation and durability (don't be all flaked on my cheeks at the end of the day).

And the winner? BENEFIT! Yay! Big, fat brush separates lashes, you can get by with one coat (2 is better) and it stays put! Very good product.

There were two runner-ups - the Smashbox and the Sephora with their great brushes giving good coverage and separation, but we had some flaking. Still, good quality stuff.

(The new Sephora Lash Stash lists 10 mascaras, some new, some repeats, with fun names like Urban Decay's Big Fatty Mascara and Cargo Texas Lash Mascara - everything's bigger in Texas.)

Go forth and have lush lashes.

A Matter of Opinion

So, we're going to Las Vegas for 5 days and four nights. The day temps are expected to be in the 80's and the evenings will be in the 50's. We'll be doing everything from gambling, bar-hopping and fine-dining to gambling, shopping and drinking. Because of the temperature shifts and the varying levels of activities, this is my packing list:

3 cardigans
1 wrap
4 tank tops
2 jeans
4 pants (3 cropped, 1 long)
6 T-shirts
1 long-sleeved T
1 long-sleeved polo
1 long-sleeved sweater
1 silky shirt
3 purses
5 pairs of shoes

This list also covers what I'll be wearing out and back. Too much? Or just right? Don't want to be a suitcase hog. :)

Not That Kind of Deposit!

So I'm in my cube today. It was a particularly busy day as yesterday was a Jewish holiday. My cube is situated right next to the waiting area and I've often had the pleasure of being able to smell some of my customers' various degrees of uncleanliness before they even sit down across the desk from me.

I'm helping a nice lady opening a CD (4% APY for 10 months - not so bad!) when this odor wafts in. After it got noticeably stronger, I commented, "That's an interesting smell." My customer agreed. "It kinda smells like turkey." Not quite.

I had seen a regular elderly customer shuffling off to the back of the branch where the loo is. It's not supposed to be used by customers, but some of them just go without asking.

My customer and I conclude that the smell is more akin to a dirty diaper. Oh, joy.

She and I both exit my cube at the conclusion of our business - she departs to the left, I to the right. As I'm approaching my manager's office, I see it. There's poop on the carpet. Two clumps. Just sitting there. I walk into Boss's office with my eyes damn near out of my head. "There's poop on the floor!" I exclaim. He just looked at me, tightlipped and nodded.

I stand by his window with my hand over my mouth. I am a poopophobe. I don't know if I can go back out there. I hear someone out in the lobby asking for help.

I come out of Boss's office and my customer who exited left has stepped in poop. Indoors. In a bank. Right outside my cube. Oh my fucking god.

Things after that are a gaggy blur. The customer made a mess in the bathroom and the branch manager cleaned everything up. He is the MVP for the rest of the year, unless something worse happens. I really don't think that's possible, though.

Ploys For Tots

John McCain is a bitch. And that is no way a sexist remark secretly meant for Sarah Palin, because she's a skeevy motherfucker. Big difference.

Anyways, when the news came out today that McCain was suspending his campaign due to the financial crisis, I absolutely believed it was for some other reason besides the financial crisis. I saw his press conference yesterday. He talked about oversight. A lot. But he didn't delve into the problem. His thoughts on the matter were very superficial.

If he was as concerned as his recent move to delay his campaigning suggested, he would've said a lot more than he did. So this is a ploy to show how concerned he is or it's a ploy to put off the debate a little so he can study up. Either way, it's "transparent", but not necessarily in a good way.

Just sayin'.

Poem

There's a lady that comes into my bank branch. She writes poetry. I submit it for your approval.

My Mother Yet Again

How to deal with it?
Facing her yet again,
every morning.
Smiling,
almost always on,
histronics so similar
to those of the original.
Putting herself on display,
make-up thickly applied.
She adds to the effect with
a showy blonde wig.
Did mother call everyone
'dear' and 'darling' as her clone does?
That I don't recall,
but I know mother was a
crowd-pleaser, as ditto,
my morning slice of phoney-baloney!
How can I interact civilly?
I really know I need to manage better
these feelings if it's not too late to do!

But, every day, it's early tuning up
of a stalling engine.
I almost always drag myself in
groggy and low, and I need desperately
for everyone to be real, but, God,
there's so much going on that isn't.
Please don't smother me with
'dear's or 'darling's or 'ha-ha' in my face!

Don't want to be a bitch, but,
at times like these, almost every day,
it's so difficult not to.

Maybe you need to know Slavia to really appreciate this. I like it.

How Awesome Is TDS?

We watch The Daily Show on DVR, so we're almost a week behind. I had to tell you that as an explanation as to why I'm saying this now.

They were at the Republican National Convention last week in St. Paul. At the beginning of every show, they included the phrase, "Restoring Honor and Dignity to the White House." That's it. No snark. No joke. Because obviously that phrase is a fucking joke on its own merit. Awesome.

I Am NOT Meant to Mow the Lawn Today

The first thought in my head when I woke up this morning was, "We should do the lawn first thing before Hanna gets here because we won't be able to do it later today or tomorrow." This summer we've taken to mowing every other weekend, but we really can't let it go longer than that.

When I got up to use the facilities at 7:00, it was already raining. There goes that idea.

The ground was relatively dry around breakfast time (noon today), so I figured we'd better get it in. And by "we", I mean both me and Toast - he does the front and I do the back. I hadn't showered yet, so I decided that I'd do my half first so I could shower while he did his half.

Walking out to the shed to retrieve the lawnmower, I saw poop. Big poop. I am poopophobic. It's probably the main reason I've never owned a dog. Well, that and the fact that they tend to be a little needy. Anyways, I find some leaves to pick it up with, but it's squishy.

I whine to Toast that I can't do the lawn because there's poop and I can't move it. He does the heroic husbandly thing and eradicates the back lawn of the two dastardly doodies.

I get the lawnmower out of the shed. First pull on the cord doesn't start it, but it does shoot a tiny little mouse out of the engine area. He's a little discombobulated. Once he gets his bearing, he tears ass off the front of the mower and lands upside-down in front of the mower. I bend over to look at him and make sure he's okay. He shakes off the fall and runs under the lawnmower. I tell him he's stupid and lift the machine off so he can scurry off to a safer place. He scoots into the flower bed. Okay.

I fire up the lawnmower and start around the outer edge of the yard. I'm at about my fifth pass when the lawnmower stops, just stops cold dead. I checked the gas, but there was still quite a bit in there. Toast came out and checked the oil which was low. I don't know if machines are smart enough to shut down when there's a threat of running out of oil, so I don't know if that's what caused it. All I know is we don't have the kind of oil for the mower, so I will not be mowing the lawn today.

It apparently was not meant to be.

Question of the (Insert Preferred Time Period Here)

So, next weekend Toast, Fridge, Chemist and I are going to one of the last games at Yankee Stadium. We had originally tried to gets tickets to an Angels game at said venue as one of these things is not like the others (DC is an Angels fan), but we waited too long and the tickets were prohibitively expensive. So we're going next Sunday to see the Bronx Bombers play the fucking Devil Rays.

But first the Chemist will be visiting the Shire for a slumber party. To commemorate the event, I'm going to make my monthly Bon Appétit meal the night that he's here. I usually give Toast the honors, but tonight, my dear husband's readers, I'm letting you pick the Bon Appétit meal that I make for our guest(s). Here are the options...

1. Bigoli with Onion-Anchovy Sauce
2. Green Lentil Salad with Bacon and Ham
3. Baked Fish with Thai Lemon-Mint Sauce
4. Semolina Gnocchi with Oxtail Ragu
5. Mac and Cheese with Pancetta
6. Angus Meatloaf with Crushed Yukon Gold Potatoes and Bibb Salad
7. Pork Char Siu with Steamed Chinese Buns
8. Slow-Cooked Brisket Sandwiches with Blue (sic) Cheese Coleslaw

There are only two recipes that I was able to link from epicurious.com, but the others are relatively straight-forward.

Fridge, you're welcome to come up, too. Whether or not you spend the night is your choice. We've got an inflatable mattress if you want to crash.

Everybody gets one vote, except for Tart, who gets two because she knows the subject matter so well.

Food Meme - Yum

This is cool. I'll be so impressed if anybody comes anywhere near Angelos' list.

1. Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2. Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3. Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
(4. I've added my own bit - put asterisks after what you must try before you die.)

(note: if you don't know what something is, go to the VGT post , they have wiki links)

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare***
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho***
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle***
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche***
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda ***
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more***
46. Fugu***
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine***
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe***
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant***
85. Kobe beef***
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor***
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

Yum, yum, yum.

Decolletage

Do we have any side-sleepers in the house? I need some help.

I am 43 years old. I got my parents' good aging genes and look younger than I am. I've got one furrow wrinkle in between my brows and a couple of worry lines on my forehead, but besides that I'm basically wrinkle-free.

That is, except for my upper chest. In this area, I more closely resemble a leathery, elderly sun-worshipper. I've found through some research that this is because I sleep on my side and it squishes that skin until there are ravines running south from the clavicles. Does anybody else have this problem? Have you found anything that fixes it? And I hate to say "fixes" like this is broken, but I don't like this area of my body looking so much older than any other part of me.

I'd appreciate any help at all.

Question of the (Insert Preferred Time Period Here)

Coming home after a day at work is a glorious thing. Walking into your own space, being able to do your own thing between now and when you have to go back to work is one of life's serene joys.

When I was a kid, the first thing my Dad would do when he got home was take off his shoes. My mother-in-law takes off her bra. Toast immediately changes into his comfy clothes and slippers (cold weather) or Crocs (warm weather). To feel completely comfortable, I put on a bandeau to pull the hair off of my face and use a clippie to put up the back. There, all better! I can even walk around in my work clothes for a while as long as the hair's off my face.

What thing do you do when you get home from work that signifies the break and eases you into your evening?

Happy Vinyl Day!

This is a meme from konagod that may be fun or it may be tedious (see Furious' meme). I'm sure it'll be fine, except for the fact that my iPod is actually Toast's old iPod and I haven't updated it with music that I want on it yet. This could be an exercise then, even for me. And I'm going with Angelos' suggestion of only doing 10 songs. And I hope I have enough (borrowed) readers to play. :) Here we go...

1. New York snow this time of year
There's nothing more beautiful to me
Except for you
Making my way on the town and down

2. Debbie just hit the wall
She never had it all
One Prozac a day
Husband's a CPA
1985 - Bowling for Soup(Susan got it!)

3. She packed my bags last night pre-flight
Zero hour nine a.m.
And I'm gonna be high as a kite by then
I miss the earth so much I miss my wife
Rocket Man - Elton John(Got it - Wilde)

4. There's a man I've found
Could bring us all joy!
There's a doctor I've found can cure the boy!
A doctor I've found can cure the boy!
There's a Doctor I've Found - The Who (Mike got it, better late than never)

5. Well, if you want to sing out, sing out
And if you want to be free, be free
cause there's a million things to be
You know that there are
If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out - Cat Stevens(Wilde again - from an old favorite movie of Toast's - "Harry and Maude")

6. Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don’t like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Girlfriend - Avril Levigne(Yay, Angelos!)

7. Revvin' up your engine
Listen to her howlin' roar
Metal under tension
Beggin' you to touch and go
Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins from the Top Gun soundtrack and while he tried to leave it for VMH, Angelos got this one!

8. Don't think me unkind
Words are hard to find
The only cheques I've left unsigned
From the banks of chaos in my mind
De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da - The Police(Joolz got this one - Welcome!)

9. Sitting in my class
Just drifting away
Staring into the windows of the world
I can't hear the teacher

10. I never knew that a kid like me
Could take his mic around the world and flash the big S.D.
And rock the masses, from Madrid to Calabassas
Tijuana, Mexico, bootleg demos in Tokyo

Okay, I only did songs that I know, so it's relatively representative of my music. Have fun!

Notes From Cheap Girl

Sarah Jessica Parker has a line of clothing out called Bitten. Everything in the line - jeans, jackets, jewelry, everything - is $20 or under. SJP wants people to be fashionable even if they don't have a ton of cash. Very admirable.

The only store that carries it, to my knowledge, is Steve and Barry's. The closest one to me is at the Eastfield Mall in Springfield, which is about an hour away as it's on the far eastern side of the city which is basically inaccessible by highway. I've never gone because it seemed like kind of a pain in the ass to get to, although I've wanted to check it out and own some of her clothes.

Well, S&B's is going out of business, so I figured I'd better high tail it if I wanted to own any of the Bitten line. I went up this past Thursday with my Mom. Lots of cute stuff in the store. None of the clothes looked good on me, but I did get a beautiful gold winter scarf and a long brushed gold-tone necklace with a pretty light blue stone wrapped in gold wire at the end. These two, plus every other item in the store, are only $8.98 each! It's a going out of business sale, yo!

They have college jackets, T-shirts, jeans, PJ's and other celebrity lines, including Venus Williams and Stephon Marbury (who I always thought was kinda cool because instead of going for a crazy lucrative sneaker deal, he designed something even people on the tightest budgets could afford). Especially with school starting soon, I can't recommend the place enough. Pop in - you're bound to find something you like. And for $8.98, you can't go wrong!

Free Lee

It's only been one day since the news broke, but I don't see this becoming the firestorm that Lee Stranahan thought it would. Phew! It's not pretty, because John Edwards will now come crashing down off of his pedestal, but I don't think the media is going to do much with this. It's a juice story, but it's not like he's the candidate or anything. And thank Flying Spaghetti Monster for that. It would most indubitably have been our downfall.

I was originally going to lament over how John Edwards could have been so incredibly stupid as to jeopardize the future of this country to feed his own ego. But then I went over to Kos to see what kind of kerfuffle Lee had stirred up. WTF?!?!?!?!? Seriously? He's banned? Uh, he was right. I don't know if he got it right that the blue states would have necessarily pounced on this were it Romney as he is a douchebag and a Mormon, but it would've made for a lot of jokes. That's all. Everything else Lee stated in his post was accurate. He actually didn't even go far enough stating how irresponsible it was of Edwards.

Lee got accused of being rude and that's why he was banned. Wow, what complete and utter bullshit. If people had said half the shit about me, I may've been rude in retort...

And I was attacked. Read the comments if you have any doubts. I was called an asshole and a prick and a douchebag and liar and a troll and a concern troll and if I wasn’t troll, I was sure ACTING like a troll. People said I fucked gorillas and dogs. I was compared to dictators and told my penis should fall off. I was accused of being a GOP operative. It was seriously suggested that I worked for Karl Rove or Walmart. My motivations, intelligence, honesty, fitness to write and future prospects were all questions.

Lee's a very old friend and he's wicked smaht. I'm glad to see that his extreme intelligence has taken him down the same path that I followed - from Objectivist to Libertarian to Democrat. It's a strange path, but my bestest of friends have followed it also. That's saying something. But anyhoo, I shall be contacting the administrators over at Kos and asking for an apology and his disbanment (is that a word?). I know he has some friends among my (borrowed) readers (I'm looking at you, Chris Howard), so I hope you'll follow me over.

Productive - oui ou non?

Today, Toast and I were supposed to get these things done - unclog a drain, weed the garden, mow the lawn, clean the kitchen and scrub the mildew off the shower curtain (it's plastic and I would normally just throw it out, but I'm trying to keep stuff out of landfills as much as I can).

The things that actually got done were the unclogging of the drain, the weeding of approximately 3 square feet of garden and clean up the brick sidewalk and driveway, and go through two giant piles of (37) saved magazines in the kitchen (this literally took about 2 hours, because I had to go through each one, check the dog-eared pages and either rip them out or do them). Not all of our planned stuff got done, but I cleaned the hallway, tidied up the dining room and Toast did two loads of laundry and cleaned the toilets.

I always get frustrated when things don't go as planned. Would you consider this a productive day even though barely half of our planned things got done? BTW, the lawn didn't really need mowing.

Previews

Toast and I went to see The Dark Knight over the weekend. AMAZING!!! Absolutely wonderful movie - great pace, great acting, great development. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

But even before the movie started, two previews had me staring at the screen, mouth agape.

Quantum of Solace, the new James Bond movie looks incredible. I've read all the Bond books and Daniel Craig is the best. Bond. Ever. I shall never miss a one if he is in it. November 7, baby!

I first saw the original The Day the Earth Stood Still as a young teen and I fell in love with the storyline. This looks so well made that 12/12 can't come soon enough. Klaatu barada nikto.

I generally live life one day at a time (or one vacation at a time), but these two will be stuck in the back of my brain and every once in a while, I'll think, "Can't wait for November!"

Lawnmower Man?

(Kinda sorry to steal from my husband, but...) Overheard at Casa de Toast:

Me: (who often talks to herself)(upon exiting the shower and hearing a lawnmower out front, knowing that 3 out of 5 adjacent yard-owners mowed their lawns yesterday with one other not being close enough to confuse the sound and the other going for weeks at a time without their service coming) Oh, my husband's mowing the lawn!

Husband: (from office chair) What?

The Furious Meme

This looks like a lot of fun.

Start at the wikipedia page of the year of your birth, and pick the best (or your favorite) album from each year you've been alive.

1965 - Help! - The Beatles
1966 - If You Can Believe Your Eyes & Ears - The Mamas and the Papas
1967 - Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band - The Beatles
1968 - The White Album - The Beatles (although it pained me to not pick Waiting For the Sun by the Doors, one of my first favorite albums)
1969 - Abbey Road - The Beatles
1970 - Pearl - Janis Joplin (American Beauty was also excellent)
1971 - Led Zeppelin IV - um, Led Zeppelin
1972 - Burning Love - Elvis
1973 - Tubular Bells - Mike Oldfield
1974 - The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway - Genesis
1975 - Born To Run - Bruuuuuuuce
1976 - 2112 - Rush
1977 - Never Mind the Bullocks, Here's the Sex Pistols - The Sex Pistols (left to my own devices, I would've put a semicolon instead of a comma)
1978 - The Cars - The Cars
1979 - Breakfast in America - Supertramp
1980 - Back in Black - AC/DC
1981 - Abacab - Genesis
1982 - Signals - Rush
1983 - I'm so sorry, but this is a tie and I cannot decide - 90125 by Yes and War by U2 (AND I was initially going to go with The Crossing by Big Country because In A Big Country is my favorite song ever)
1984 - Purple Rain soundtrack - Prince
1985 - Rum, Sodomy and the Lash - The Pogues
1986 - So - Peter Gabriel
1987 - Appetite for Destruction - Guns 'n Roses
1988 - Rattle and Hum - U2
1989 - Paul's Boutique - Beastie Boys
1990 - Shake Your Money Maker - The Black Crowes
1991 - Nevermind - Nirvana
1992 - Funky Divas - En Vogue
1993 - Exile in Guyville - Liz Phair
1994 - Evil, evil, evil meme, making me choose! It's not right! Goddamnit! I can't. It's a 3-way tie. I don't care. I can't choose. Superunknown - Soundgarden; Throwing Copper - Live; Under the Table and Dreaming - Dave Matthews Band
1995 - Sparkle and Fade - Everclear
1996 - Sublime - Sublime
1997 - Deconstructed - Bush
1998 - Devil Without a Cause - Kid Rock
1999 - Significant Other - Limp Bizkit
2000 - The Marshall Mathers LP - Eminem
2001 - Morning View - Incubus
2002 - Come Away With Me - Norah Jones
2003 - Speakerboxxx/The Love Below - Outkast
2004 - American Idiot - Green Day
2005 - Am I just old or did this year suck for music? Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield
2006 - Future Sex/Love Sounds - Justin Timberlake (he's a fun guy - this year featured the Jonas Brothers and Paris Hilton, so cut me some slack - I'm not up on music like I used to be)
2007 - Back to Black - Amy Winehouse (I think this was released in 2006, but it was a best seller in 2007)
2008 - I plead the fifth. I just don't follow music anymore.

In retrospect, this was too much work. I'm not tagging anyone, although, if you read Furios' blog, you've already been tagged. Hah!

It's past the bird's bedtime now. Goodnight.

P.S. This exercise frustrated me. I forgot that in dealing with Wikipedia, you're getting what has been put in here by the general public. There were artists that would come up and I'd think, "Hey, that's not his first album, but this is the first year I saw his name listed! Damn!" That could explain things like 1992, 1997 and 2006 (I don't even know that album!).

Forgivable Five

I had to wait for Toast at the gym today as I got done a bit before him. I decided to put in some time on the bike while reading one of the gym magazines. I was perusing all of the Health's and Fitnesses and GQ's when I saw a headline that intrigued me on Vanity Fair's October 2007 issue - Meet the Real Stephen Colbert. I would absolutely lurve to meet the real Stephen Colbert, so I picked it up and went over to the bike.

I turned to the page listed for the story and this is what greeted me...



Goddamn he's hawt! I'm not really one to drool as I've married the man of my dreams, but there are just some men...

Which brings me to my Question - what five famous people would you want listed in the contract that your significant other had to forgive you if, you know, you just happened to meet them and you just happened to hit it off and they just happened to express interest in some hot, shallow monkey sex?

Mine.

1. Stephen T. Colbert. There's something about a smart, funny man that I find incredibly sexy. The mystery aspect of him always being in character only adds to the intrigue. Yow.
2. Eddie Vedder. Physically very attractive, creative, confident and there's that spark of "just a little crazy" in his eyes. Ooh, baby.
3. Peyton. Big, strong and doofy. Yeah, I like 'em like that, too. Sometimes a woman likes to feel tiny and girly.
4. A-Rod. Big and strong, but not doofy. However, the combination of him being in touch with his feelings and the smoldering Latino thing would definitely get him around the bases, if you know what I mean. Wheee.
5. I used to have Bill Clinton in this spot, but he behaved so boorishly during the primaries that he's out. I'm not sure now. There's got to be some movie star. Think, think. Johnny Depp? Yes, but no. Kevin Spacey? No, but yes. I know! Although he ain't all that anymore, James Spader used to be the man that all women found hot. It was universal. "Sex, Lies and Videotape"? Anyone? Anyone? Way.

Sure, this is a meme! I'm tagging Toast, Fridge, all the Howards, Angelos, Wilde, the god who is kona, Mike, Tart and maurinsky. Not Chemist, because he's newly engaged and it might be too early to start busting out such things. And, obviously, if your significant other doesn't have this particular type of sense of humor, you get a pass.

Ode to a Coach and a 'Keet

I have always been a huge fan of mnemonic devices, so when Coach started singing about Albania, I had a whole new set of facts to store with virtually no effort! If it goes with the timing, I can sing about many things to the ditty that he made up. For instance, there's this bird...

Fourth of July Meme

Courtesy of Toast...


1. Are you "proud to be an American"?
Not presently. Sad. Our president is an embarrassment. Our economy is leading the downward spiral because of our unchecked greed. But I think a lot of Americans are starting to see that our arrogance is unwarranted and maybe we'll stop resting on our laurels and start being a country I can be proud of again.

2. Favorite Founding Father?
Ben Franklin. Smart, funny, suave, fun-haver. I'd definitely hang out with him were he around today.

3. Favorite president?
It used to be Calvin Coolidge because he didn't really do much (back when I was an Objectivist small-government-loving Libertarian). And while he's no longer my favorite, he is from Northampton, Massachusetts and he was a funny fucking guy. I don't currently have a favorite.

4. Biggest "Patriotic Moment"?
Can't think of one.

5. Favorite patriotic song?
It's not really patriotic, but I love "American Girl" by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers.

6. Favorite American cuisine?
New England clam chowder...mmmm, creamy goodness surrounding chewy clams. Heaven!

7. Happiest political moment of your life?
I never cared much about politics before hooking up with Toast and not much good has happened since then politically, so I'll go with Ned Lamont winning the Democratic nomination for Senate. I'll always hold a special place in the coldest, darkest part of my heart for that fuckwad, Joe Lie-berman, for fucking that all up. It started a grassroots movement, though, so not all was lost.

8. Best fireworks display you've ever seen?
I don't have a good memory for such things.

9. America's gift to the world?
Our attitude and our music.

10. Favorite Bill of Rights right?
The first, second and sixth all both great, but I'll go with a nice combination of the first and second.

"The people should never fear their government; the government should fear its citizens."

"Oh, how I wish our populace were educated about the concept of a General Strike! Combine the political possibilities of a nationwide shutdown with the communicative power of the net, and that might well be more fearful to a government than an armed populace. "

(Thank you, nightshift.)

11. Favorite American Holiday?
Thanksgiving. Turkey. Potatoes. Cranberries. Pie.

12. Favorite D.C. monument?
I guess the Lincoln Memorial. I haven't been to Washington, D.C. since I was a preteen, so I don't have a good recollection.

13. Your dream for America's future?
To learn from our myriad mistakes and come out all the better because of them. Lead the world in technology, space exploration, the arts, start a new Renaissance.

Bon Appetit Drink, June '08

Every month, Bon Appétit has a featured drink and I figure, why the hell not?

Michelada

The Michelada, at its core a simple mixture of beer and hot sauce, sounds like a drink concocted by cash-strapped college kids. But cerveza preparada (prepared beer) is a traditional favorite in Mexico and the American Southwest, where you'll never find it made the same way twice (and where it is often enjoyed in the morning after a long night). Some like the addition of tomato juice, but on a sweltering summer's day we prefer a crisp, refreshing version like the one from Israel Prado of El Chile Cafe y Cantina in Austin. It's our new favorite hot-weather cocktail.

Makes 1

1 lime wedge
Chile with salt and lime seasoning (such as Chilimon)*
Ice cubes
2 tablespoons fresh lime juice
1 dash hot pepper sauce
1 dash Worcestershire sauce
1 12-ounce bottle Dos Equis lager

Run lime wedge around rim of 20-ounce glass [bigger than a pint - we used the infamous Coors Light football glasses from BWW - perfect!] to moisten. Pour seasoning onto small plate; dip rim of glass in seasoning. Fill glass with ice. Add lime juice, hot pepper sauce, and Worcestershire sauce to glass. Add beer. Sprinkle with more seasoning and serve.

*A dry seasoning blend of chiles, salt, and lime; available at some supermarkets and Latin markets.

This is surprisingly very refreshing. I thought the bite of the pepper sauce would remove that, but it seems to do the opposite. It's as if that little bit of kick accentuates the stimulating and crisp cold of the icy beer and lime juice.

The recipe doesn't mention that you should mix it and the picture in the magazine shows a darkness hovering around the bottom of the glass that implies you shouldn't, but it was much better when you stir it up and get all of the flavor in every sip. Also I didn't find Chilimon (although I love the name and will seek it out), but mixing kosher salt with chile powder seemed to suffice.

This drink is a nice change of pace. I find it much more refreshing than straight beer on a warm summer day.

Of course, let me know if you try it and what you think. And this isn't a meme, but I think I'm going to tag Chemist on this one. :)

Bon Appetit Meal, June '08

The meal Toast picked for this month was a wonderful combination of tastes and textures.

Farfalle with Chicken, Tomatoes, Carmelized Onions and Goat Cheese
4 to 6 servings

This pasta is loaded with appealing flavors: sweet onions and tomatoes, tangy goat cheese, earthy spinach.

2 tablespoons olive oil
2 large red onions, thinly sliced
2 tablespoons Sherry wine vinegar
1 teaspoon sugar
8 ounces farfalle
1 cup dry white wine
1 cup low-salt chicken broth
6 heirloom tomatoes, cored, chopped (about 5 cups)
2 cups shredded cooked chicken (from 1/2 rotisserie chicken)
1/2 cup thinly sliced basil leaves
2 tablespoons chopped fresh marjoram
3 cups baby spinach
3 ounces soft fresh goat cheese, crumbled

Heat oil in heavy large skillet over medium-high heat. Add onions; sprinkle with salt and cook until beginning to brown, stirring often, about 8 minutes [probably actually went about twice that long]. Reduce heat to medium-low. Stir in vinegar and sugar; cook until onions are browned, stirring often, about 15 minutes. Transfer carmelized onions to bowl; reserve skillet.

Meanwhile, cook pasta in large pot of boiling salted water until tender but still firm to bite, stirring occasionally. Drain.

Add wine to reserved skillet. Boil until reduced to 1/2 cup, 3 minutes. Add pasta, onions, broth, and next 4 ingredients. Season with salt and pepper. Stir over medium heat to warm through, about 3 minutes.

Divide spinach among plates. Spoon pasta over spinach. Top with crumbled goat cheese.

This was a nice recipe. It was easy, but the prep work took a while - that's a lot of onion and tomato chopping. I used a chardonnay as it was the only white I had on hand and I used on-the-vine tomatoes instead of heirloom (Dude, heirloom tomatoes are expensive!). It turned out just fine with these two alterations.

The flavors were very fresh and light. You can easily get away with adding more chicken. That would only be a benefit. I used 4 ounces of goat cheese instead of three and probably could've done with even more. Mmm, goat cheese.

This recipe makes a lot of food. I did the full boat as we like leftovers in this family. Well, Toast had a helping and a half for dinner, I had one helping for dinner, then we still had 3 lunches from it (1 large one for Toast, two smaller for me).

All in all, a very good choice. Let me know if you try it and what you think.

I like to call this one "I'm Getting A New Computer"

I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER! I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER! I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER! I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER! OMFSM, I AM SO EXCITED! I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER!

Can you tell I'm excited? Today I ordered a brand spanking new Dell Inspiron 530. For those of you who are acquainted with the geeky arts, it has an Intel® Core™ 2 duo processor, 2GB dual channel DDR2 SDRAM and a 250GB Serial ATA hard drive. I don't know what any of this means, but Toast says it's good.

Yay! I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER! I'M GETTING A NEW COMPUTER!

Across the Cultures

(CAUTION - drunk post!) I have a coworker named Aphrodite. She was born in New York City, but her parents are straight-off-the-boat Greeks. Many people of other cultures, though, can't get her name right. People have called her "Ananconda", "Aphrodisiac", even "Arbor Vitae." It makes for much amusement in the workplace. There was once even an African American (read: black) gentleman who called her Nefertiti. Not even close phonetically, but similar in the goddess aspect.

Which brings me to my cross-cultural story - I bought Nubian Heritage soap. It's "100% Black Owned & Proud of It!" Excellent. I just hope that us white people can use it, too! The smells were so wonderful and the price was so right at Wild Oats (compared to the $6.29's of other soaps) (excepting the $1.19 of the most awesome Chandrika Ayurvedic soap of which I purchased two bars!) that I bought four, bitchez! Oh, the scents of the Black Seed Soap with Apricot Oil and Wild Honey (Cold Pressed). Or the African Black Soap (black box, black soap) with Shea Butter, Oats and Aloe (Deep Cleansing)! The first one that got me was the lovely Coconut & Papaya Soap with Vanilla Beans (this is said to be "Skin Brightening"). And then there's the Shea Butter Soap, of course, with Lavender and Wildflowers (Extra Gentle & Ultra Moisturizing). All so scrumpdilly, yo!

I realize that black peoples' skin is different from whites'. I went to a mostly black, some Hispanic and a little bit of whites high school. I know that black people get ashy skin. Other than that, I hope there's not much of a difference and that these Nubian Heritage soaps make me and my white husband clean and good-smelling!

Heebie Jeebies

I have a weird thing about skin. I have nightmares where a bunch of little spiders will come out of one of my pores. Or one where a pore is just a big hole, big enough you could stick your finger in, with a hair growing up out of the middle of it. Any holes in skin or things in skin really creeps me out. I bet it comes from my "Uncle" Archie - he had shrapnel in his skin from WWII and periodically a piece would come out of him. Just show up, sticking out of his body. He'd scratch at it and pick until he got it out. Then there'd be this hole in his skin that was so big you could stick stuff in it. I can barely type this I've got the heebie jeebies so bad.

Anyway, I tell you about this heebie jeebiness because I got bit by a tick this weekend. I don't know if it happened when I was mowing or when I went to Toast's ride (the parking area was a muddy lot near a lot of trees and water). I'm thinking it happened when I was mowing, because I was so sweaty and bug-pestered that I was just brushing the bugs off of me without really paying attention to what they looked like.

I wasn't sure what it was at first, but by doing a little bit of research, I found that the black dot on my arm with the red circle around it and the white circle around that was indeed a tick bite. No big. I'm sure Lyme Disease isn't pleasant, but I can handle it, if it indeed comes to that.

I just went about my business the next day. I told people I had a tick bite, but no one thought anything of it. One of my coworkers, Debra, had actually been hospitalized last year with complications from a tick bite. I showed it to her at about two in the afternoon.

"Oh, Tracy, the head's still in there! You have to get that out!" My eyes just about popped out of my head. Yeah, I have to get that out! I immediately went to my computer and scoured Google for pictures. I was mortified. And frozen. That was what I had in my arm. I could hardly breathe. I tried to do some work, but I couldn't. I was in no mental state to do anything, but go to the doctor.

I called and made an appointment, but couldn't even wait the hour and a half until I was done for the day. I left work immediately and headed straight for his office. The wait wasn't too long and I kept myself relatively calm in the waiting room.

They called my name fifteen minutes later and I only had another fifteen minute wait before the doctor came in. He concurred with Debra's assertion and was concerned about the bullseye rings, too. He left the room for a moment and came back with a scalpel. Normally my reaction to this would've been, "What do you think you're doing with that?" In this instance, however, I was perfectly willing to let him cut me, anaesthesia or no. Just get this out of me!

A couple flicks and the deed was done. I was immediately relieved. He gave me an antibiotic just in case there were any Lyme issues, but I didn't even care about that anymore. The terrible little head was out of my skin.

Morning Song

I lately realized that every single day upon awakening, I've got a song in my head. I don't know if it's remnants from a dream or if I'm in some sleep stage just before awakening that picks up radio waves. Either way, it's funky and it's not just me - Toast has concurred with me on this. Now we wake up every morning and ask the other what song is in their head. Do you experience this also? I bet if you pay attention, you'll find that you do.

As of late, I usually have songs that are played on the radio station at work, WRCH. It's not a bad work station, but I've had everything in my head from country songs to Madonna to this morning's tune, Not Gonna Write You A Love Song. I fear Celine Dion or Michael Bolton may be next.

Thank you, Sandman?

I've always raved to Toast about the Sandman comic series by Neil Gaiman. I had a friend who was huge into comics and he thought I'd like these. Well, he was absolutely right! I don't remember a lot about them as it was almost twenty years ago. I just remember they were wicked cool.

Anyhoo, I got Toast a few collections for Xmas and he, after finishing many other things he needed to read first, has been soaking them up like a sponge. For some reason, though, whenever I mention the name "Sandman", his thoughts go to this skit by Lenny Bruce called "Thank You, Masked Man." Of course he titters at the thought, because TYMM is absolutely hilarious. Classic shit. I hope you enjoy it. And definitely check out Sandman if you haven't already.

Bon Appétit Meal, May '08

Oh, Bon Appétit, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height that my tongue can taste and my stomach can stretch.

Truly, I have been a HUGE fan of BA for years, nay decades, now. I have read all the others, the Cooking Light's, the Gourmet's, the Food and Wine's. None can compare. It's their adventurous yet approachable recipes combined with wonderful asides covering spirits, travel and gadgets that make it a perfect foodie magazine.

As long as Toast and I have been together, we've had a tradition where I'll read each month's edition, dog-ear the recipes that I'd like to make and then let him pick out his favorite. Some have been great, some became semi-regular stars on the menu, others too labor-intensive or just not our cup of tea, but it's always interesting.

Thus starts the BA Meal of the Month! I hope you enjoy it.

The recipe chosen from the May '08 edition was Carne Asada (I can't help but think of that Taco Bell commercial with the lions saying, "Carrrrrrne asada") with Salsa Mexicana. Please note that everything in brackets "[]" are my comments. Also know that whenever I do a recipe for the first time, I follow it by the book. I'll let you know afterwards if I'd make any alterations.

Carne Asada
6 to 8 servings [halves perfectly]

Arrachera (skirt steak) is one of the most popular grilled meats in the Yucatán - served sizzling hot off the steel-drum grills of street vendors and at restaurants like La Parrilla in Cancún. [Did you know that skirt steak is cow diaphragm?]

8 poblano chiles
2 bunches green onions (about 12), dark green tops trimmed
2 pounds skirt steak, cut crosswise into 6-inch-wide pieces
4 garlic cloves, minced
Coarse kosher salt
Corn or flour tortillas
2 avocados, peeled, pitted, sliced
Lime wedges
Salsa Mexicana (see recipe to follow)

Prepare barbecue (high heat). Grill chiles and onions until charred all over, about 3 minutes for onions and 5 minutes for chiles. [Toast grilled these for the stated times and they weren't nearly charred enough. I found that you can't peel them very well unless they're charred, so use your judgment.] Transfer onions to plate; tent with foil. Transfer chiles to large bowl; cover with plastic and let stand 15 minutes. Peel and seed; cut into 1-inch-wide strips. Transfer to plate; tent with foil.

Rub steak with garlic; sprinkle with coarse salt and pepper. Grill until cooked to desired doneness, about 3 minutes per side for medium. Transfer to work surface; cool 5 minutes. Grill tortillas until warm and slightly charred, about 10 seconds per side. Cut steak crosswise into strips; transfer to plate.

Serve steak with tortillas, chiles, green onions, avocado slices, lime wedges and Salsa Mexicana.

Salsa Mexicana
Makes about 1½ cups [again, halves perfectly, although this is so good, you could have it with tortilla chips later]

12 ounces tomatoes (about 2 medium), cut into ¼-inch cubes
1 medium white onion (about 7 ounces), cut into ¼-inch cubes
2 to 8 serrano or jalapeño chiles, chopped
¼ cup chopped fresh cilantro
3 tablespoons fresh lime juice
Coarse kosher salt

Combine first 5 ingredients in medium bowl. Season to taste with coarse salt. Do Ahead Can be made 2 hours ahead. Let stand at room temperature.

This recipe was awesome! It was flavorful and fresh. I had never had carne asada before and Toast had never had it with tortillas, but we both thoroughly enjoyed it. Besides the few notes in the recipe, it's easy to follow and everything came out great. I tend to not read recipes all the way through before I make them (character flaw), so I didn't know why we were cutting the meat into 6" pieces, but it worked out in the end. I wouldn't make any alterations, although Toast thought the meat should have been "zingier".

Savers!

I hate shopping. Well, okay, maybe not hate, but I have a lot of issues with shopping. First and foremost, I hate spending money so I'm ridiculously demanding when putting forth my hard-earned dollars. The item has to be perfect or inexpensive. Because I can rarely find that perfect item, enter Savers.

Savers is the king of all thrift stores. Because of the nature of Savers, YMMV. I used to live in Las Vegas and the Savers there wasn't all that, but the one in Springfield ROCKS!!! I think it's because of its proximity to Connecticut and the fact that CT doesn't have a Savers that you can find ridiculously good deals on high end stuff. Seriously I've gotten a Jones New York suit for $14 dollars and a cashmere twin set for about that same amount.

I go clothes shopping there twice a year - once after I've unpacked my seasonal clothing for both warm weather and cool weather. As I unpack the storage container, I separate the things that I didn't wear last year or that just don't fit me anymore and put them aside for donating. Then, when I have a full day to shop (I'm generally there for 3-5 hours), I grab my big-ass bag and head to Springfield.

Because of the rows and rows of clothing that are all one-of-a-kind, it literally takes me the better part of a day to do my shopping. I don't bring people with me, because it's just too much and I couldn't subject my loved ones to such trials. I break it up by doing tops, then dresses, then pants, then jeans. Depending on whether I'm in need of anything else, I can also hit the shorts section or maybe look at suits or outerwear.

I went this past Saturday after attending my little brother, Cody's, 11th birthday party. I got there around 3:00 and didn't leave until 6:30. I could've stayed longer and looked for stuff for Toast, but I was tired. I spent $52.62 and left with a nice sized bag.

I submit for your approval....my loot.

These pants are from Talbot's and a little crazy, but I really like them. They're a soft cotton, almost brushed. They cost $3.99. I haven't figured out where I'll wear them yet.



Cute little stretchy lime-green T from Dress Barn. $2.50.



These beads are heavy. I don't know what they're made of (marbled green stone - anybody know?), but I'm sure they're worth more than the $3.99 I paid for them. Yay!



I got this shirt to wear on June 13th. A woman with whom I work died last week from breast cancer. June 13th would've been her birthday and we're having a thing at work in cooperation with the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. The shirt only cost $1 and it's perfect. (I'll iron it before then.)



These navy blue pants are from the Anissa line by Liz Claiborne. Perfect for work and only $5.99!



I've always liked the Life Is Good line - so cute and positive. You can imagine how happy I was that they had one at Savers and with a yoga person no-the-less! Life is good! $2.99.



Lately I have been all about comfort. I generally don't wear heels, I don't like the feel of man-made fabrics against my skin and I don't like tight. For these reasons, I have taken to wearing mom jeans. They're comfy, but they look like shit. I've got an ass for the first time in my life (thanks to middle-age weight gain, but still) and I'm wearing droopy drawers. No more! These next two pairs of jeans look sweet! The first pair cost $7.99. I can't tell if they're by Elle or Jeanstar because both labels are inside. Who knows? Who cares? They look good!



This second pair is Todd Oldham! They don't look like they've ever been worn and they were only $5.99! Woohoo!





These pants were a find! They're a beautiful pair of wide-legged, cuffed wool/cotton blend trousers. They're by Michael Kors and they were only $3! (One thing about Savers is that they will charge more for designer labels if they know the designer. You'll pay more for Abercrombie & Fitch, Banana Republic, Calvin Klein, etc., but a lot of the employees don't know some of the more obscure labels, so you can make out, bitchez!)



I love cardigans. My workplace is cold in the winter and it's cold in the summer. Cardigans make me very happy. I went in looking for a white one, but could not find one. However I did find these beauties! The first one is a lovely silk/rayon number from Valerie Stevens that cost $5.99.



This hot ticket was also a deviation from the norm for me. Animal prints?!?! Oh my word. But it's so cute! And it will turn plain ol' black into something funky. Not bad for $3.99!



And now the pièce de résistance! This still had the tags on it. It's mohair/nylon/wool from Banana Republic and it only cost $5!!!!! I just think it's absolutely beautiful.





If you've got a Savers near you, I highly recommend you give it a try. Like I said, the one near you may not be all that, but you might just luck out and find some beautiful, well-made, very inexpensive clothes and you can't beat that with a stick.

CCJo'tD - 5/26/08

Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: What? You don't know?

Teehee.

Toast's Booze Meme

1. Beer, wine, liquor, mixed drinks. Rank 'em.

1. Wine
2. Mixed drinks
3. Beer
4. Liquor

2. How often do you drink?

Every day. And I have a schedule that I usually follow: Mondays - one drink;
Tuesdays - one drink; Wednesday - pasta night, split bottle with Toast;
Thursday - one drink; Friday, Saturday and Sunday - whatever I feel like.

3. Favorite Scotch?

I don't know that I have one. I've always had a special place in my heart for
Drambuie, but that's only Scotch-based.

4. Favorite Bourbon?

Don't have one.

5. Favorite tequila?

Don't have one.

6. Favorite Gin?

I'm sorry if this is boring, but I don't have one.

7. Favorite Vodka?

Don't have one.

8. Favorite Rum?

Captain Morgan's - it is awesome with egg nog.

9. Drunkest you've ever been?

I don't know if this was literally the drunkest I'd ever been or if it was when
my body started to metabolize alcohol differently, but there was a time that I
was carried into my apartment and put to bed by a friend (that had happened
before), but I was still drunk the next morning. That was a first. I had to
call out of work drunk. Not that I couldn't answer phones at the call center,
but there was no way I could drive there.

10. Red or White?

Red.

11. Best wine you've ever tasted?

Hmm...I have a short memory. The last one I had that knocked my socks off
(besides the two I will mention shortly) was "7 Heavenly Chards" by Lodi
Vineyards (aka Michael-David Wineries). It is their clever answer to "7
Deadly Zins." Gotta love punny wine. Oh, and it's amazing.

12. Favorite type of wine?

Shiraz (syrah) and pinot noir.

13. Favorite every-day red?

Sebeka Cabernet Pinotage.

14. Favorite every-day white?

Don't drink white that often. I used to, though, and my favorite back in the
day with Luna di Luna and it was a blend - chardonnay and pinot grigio I
believe. (Funny story - I once made a comment about a nice little pinot
grig-ee-o I had tried. Oops!)

15. Best value wine?

The Show.

16. Do you drink box?

Tschyah!

17. Fastest you've ever gotten drunk?

When I was 13, my friend, Angel, and I went into Forest Park and drank stuff she
had snagged from her mother's liquor cabinet. It was all about the experience.
Even though it all tasted like shit, we were curious. We were drinking straight
rum and vodka out of Tupperware containers. When my father found me, he made
me drink more from a 16-oz. McDonald's glass. I think Grimace was the
last thing I saw before I started spewing, quite literally, all over the house.
Once in the kitchen, once on the stairs, once at the top of the stairs, of
course in the bathroom, then all over myself in my sleep. Poor Mom.

18. Longest you've ever stayed drunk?

I have to be in a really special mood to enjoy drunkenness, so I usually don't
stay there longer than a few hours, maybe a night if I'm in one of those moods.

19. Ever do anything you really regret while drunk?

Not really regret, but I recall Lee Stranahan telling me I was an asshole when I
was drunk. We had gone to see a Police cover band in Vermont (they had a lower
drinking age than Massachusetts) and something happened with the spilling of the
popcorn and I had been thoroughly enjoying it and I got belligerent. Sorry,
Lee.

20. Favorite lager?

Corona in the summer, Stella all other times.

21. Favorite IPA?

I do not like IPA's. Not a big hop fan.

22. Favorite brown ale?

Dogfishhead Indian Brown Ale.

23. Favorite doppelbock?

I got nothin'.

24. Favorite Belgian?

I wish I could be clever like 'Shift here, but again, I got nothin'.

25. Favorite stout?

Young's Chocolate Stout.

26. Favorite Winter Ale?

Harpoon Winter Warmer.

27. Favorite Scotch Ale?

McEwan's.

28. Favorite Other?

I used to be a big Smirnoff Ice fan, but I haven't drank it in a while. I'd
probably still like it just fine.

29. Favorite Brewery?

Harpoon.

30. Favorite mixed drink?

Margarita - salt/rocks. Tequila is the best buzz EVAH.

31. Favorite morning libation?

Mimosa.

32. Do you suffer memory loss when you drink heavily?

Never. And this has been a bone of contention in the Toast household. I truly
used to think people used it as an excuse, because I've been every shade of
drunk and never missed a thing. I have since come to see the error of my ways.

33. Favorite place to drink?

Key West.

34. Favorite sports bar?

Buffalo Wild Wings. Although Coach's ranks a very close second.

35. Ever consider AA?

I went once, but it was for a friend who wouldn't go with me. :)

Substance

Toast told me that if I want people to read my blog, I've got to comment on stuff and not just regurgitate (that's my word - he wasn't that harsh) magazine entries and jokes from Comedy Central. So here are some thoughts...

- Woohoo! Thunderstorm!

- I paid $125 for a jar of Creme de la Mer. It does make my skin soft and dewy, but I'm sure a much less expensive moisturizer will do at least close to the same thing.

- HRC is an insincere thing. Do people really want that kind of person for POTUS just because she's a woman? That's some messed up shit.

- On the flip side, I love how Obama calls people on their shit! So many Democrats lay down like so many Democrats before them. This man will get those shoe marks off of our collective progressive backs.

- A woman who I work with died. She was out for a long time because she had a recurrence of her cancer, the one that took both of her breasts four years ago. She came in a week and a half ago to tell the manager that she wouldn't be back. She was a private person and didn't say much else. We really didn't know the extent of it. Very sad. (On the very same day, a mouse died in my office. I thought I may have stepped on it because he was flipping all over the place and I thought maybe one of his little tiny mouse legs was crushed under my behemoth weight and he couldn't get his bearings quickly enough to escape danger. It was in fact the mouse trap's poison taking his itty bitty life right there in front of me. Also sad.)

- Wednesday is pasta night. We drink way too much red wine and eat pasta. Toast has his with red sauce and I have mine with butter and olives and cheese. Speaking of which, I will now go make dinner. Don't want to eat too late and be fat tomorrow! (We find that when we eat earlier in the evening, we weigh less in the morning. This is, I am sure, not truly reflective of any weight loss, but it makes us happy!)

Comedy Central Joke of the Day

The Rescue

One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.

The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.

The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Bush said, "Why do you want one of those, son? You're not handicapped." The boy replied, "I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved."

(This joke actually takes the place of another joke which I found very funny, but realized that it might offend someone or hurt their feelings. If you want to know what the other joke was, let me know.)

The Magazine Project, Part I of many

I am and have always been an avid reader of fluffy magazines. Nothing deep like Time or Vanity Fair, but light little publications that I can take in small bites. Over the years, these small bites have looked so good at the time that I've got piles stashed throughout my house of dog-eared periodicals. My project for this year is to rectify the hoarding and that's one of the purposes of my blog...I'm going to put these tidbits in writing, be they cool websites or yummy looking recipes. I obviously don't want to bore anyone, but maybe you'll find something interesting. And, hey, I'll be able to refer back here instead of digging through the piles. That makes me happy. So on to Part I - Health, 03/08.


www.missingmoney.com - website to help you find out if there's any money out there that's yours. Your odds of hitting pay dirt? About 1 in 44. Not too shabby. Good luck! (I got nothing.)


If you, like me, still don't know what you want to do when you grow up...

The "LIVE" formula:
-L is for love: What do you love to do? Make a list.
-I is for inner gifts: What are your natural talents? Offer these to the world.
-V is for values: What kind of contribution do you want to leave at the end of your life? Aim your inner gifts in that direction.
-E is for environment: What people, places, timing and physical conditions bring out the best in you? Home in on them to ensure a happy career.

Getting bigger as I get older isn't working out so well, so...

The 40's Plan - How to Beat Those Health Challenges
Cardio Routine - This 35-minute routine not only helps with coordination and builds bone without straining joints, but will also burn belly fat fast. Do it 4 times a week.
1. Find a challenging but doable hill or series of hills.
2. Walk briskly for 5 minutes to warm up.
3. Power-walk up the hill, then jog back down.
4. Do 20 Walking Lunges: Step forward with your right foot and lower into a lunge position (make sure that your right knee doesn't extend past your toes). Step forward with your left foot and repeat the lunge on the opposite side.
5. Walk at a fast pace until you reach another hill, or circle back to the initial hill.
6. Repeat steps 3 through 5 for 25 minutes.
7. Cool down with 2 minutes of slow jogging and 3 minutes of walking at a moderate pace.

Strength Training - This 15-minute routine is ultraeffective at building and maintaining bone, muscle, flexibility and balance. Do it 2-3 times a week using 5 to 8 pound dumbbells, then move up to 8-10 pounds as you progress. Rest for 1 minute between moves.
One-Legged Dead Lift (for hamstrings, butt, abs, lower back)
Stand holding a dumbbell in each hand, palms facing in. Step your left foot back so your toes are just touching the floor. Tilt forward at your hips so the weights hang toward the floor with your back parallel to the floor and left foot raised to hip height; return to starting position. Do 10 reps, then switch sides and repeat.
Balancing Bicep Curls (for biceps, abs, legs)
Stand with a dumbbell in each hand, palms facing in, and left knee raised to hip height. Bend your elbows (but don't move them forward or back) and bring the weights up to your shoulders; lower your hands to complete the rep. Do 8 reps, then switch legs and repeat.
Bent-Arm Lateral Raises (for quads, abs, shoulders)
Sit on an exercise ball with feet shoulder-width apart. Hold a dumbbell in each hand, with arms down by your sides, elbows bent and palms facing in. Lift your left foot 2 inches off the floor. Then lift your elbows so the weights re at shoulder height and slowly lower them back down. Do 8 reps, switch legs and repeat.
Push-Ups on Ball (for triceps, abs)
Rest your torso on an exercise ball and walk your hands forward on the floor so your body is in plank position, with your shins on top of the ball and hands on the floor below your shoulders. Slowly bend elbows back, lowering your chest toward the floor in a push-up, then straighten your arms. Do 8 reps.

I've always been a big fan of little tips to make healthy eating easier.

Convenience can be healthy, too
Mini-yogurt packs: Yogurt has 100 more milligrams of calcium per serving than milk. Go for those with no added sugar.
Trail mix: Dried fruits are full of antioxidants. And nuts offer vitamin E, protein and healthy fats. Both are high in calories, so a small handful will do.
Frozen fruits and vegetables: They're processed at the peak of freshness.
Instand oatmeal: High in fiber and iron, this whole grain beats back heart disease. Skip the flavored, sugary packs.
Whole-grain cereals and frozen waffles: Fiber-rich whole grains offer lots of nutrients like cancer-fighting selenium and heart-healthy potassium and magnesium.
Smoothies: Those made with whole fruits and yogurt are full of antioxidants, fiber and calcium. Check for added sugar.
Low-sodium, low-fat soups: Try vegetable, bean or chicken noodle for about 90 to 170 calories per cup, 2 grams of fat and 90 to 470 milligrams of sodium (your daily limit should hover at 2,300 milligrams of sodium).
Nut butters: Add cashew or almond butter to your peanut-butter routine. They're full of healthy unsaturated oils and protein - but watch the calories.

Or more interesting.

5 ways to spice up your shopping list
1. Buffalo is grass-fed, which means you're getting a better balance of omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids.
2. Pomegranate juice, with its antioxidants and anti-inflammatory flavonoids, may slow aging and lower heart disease risks.
3. Bulgur wheat is the spine of tabouli salad. Follow package directions, then toss with a little olive oil, lemon juice, tomatoes and parsley.
4. Fennel bulb is an aromatic vegetable high in vitamin C, fiber and potassium.
5. Asian Noodles (like delicious soba or buckwheat noodles) are high in fiber and their rich store of flavonoids may lower your cholesterol and blood pressure.

This looks light and yummy...

Cilantro-Lime Shrimp Tacos
Prep: 8 minutes; cook: 2 minutes
Makes 4 servings

3/4 pound medium shrimp, peeled, deveined and cooked
1 15-oz. can black beans, rinsed and drained
1/4 cup slices scallions
1 medium diced peeled avocado
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/2 cup bottled salsa verde
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
2 tablespoons fresh lime juice
8 6" flour tortillas
1-1/4 cups red bell pepper cut into 1/4" strips (about 1 pepper)
Lime wedges, for serving
Chopped fresh cilantro, for garnish

1. Combine shrimp, beans, scallions and avocado. Season with pepper. In a separate bowl, stir together the salsa, cilantro and lime juice. Toss shrimp mixture with 1/4 cup salsa mixture.
2. Arrange tortillas on a microwave-safe plate in batches of 2. Place a damp paper towel over the tortillas and microwave at HIGH for 30 seconds.
3. Arrange 3-4 pepper strips in the center of each tortilla. Top with 1/2 cup of the shrimp-and-bean mixture. Drizzle about 1 tablespoon of the salsa verde mixture over each taco. Serve with lime wedges and cilantro. (Serving size: 2 tacos)

Calories 453 (26% from fat); fat 13g (sat 3g, mono 5g, poly 1g); cholesterol 166mg; protein 30g; carbohydrate 58g; sugars 6g; fiber 13g; iron 7mg; sodium 772mg; calcium 202mg

Mmmm, a yummy appetizer.

Marinated Feta and Olive Skewers
Marinate: 1 hour; prep: 25 minutes
Makes 8 servings

2 teaspoons fennel seeds
2 teaspoons orange zest
3 tablespoons fresh orange juice
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
4 ounces feta cheese, cut into 24 1/2" cubes
24 6" wooden skewers
24 fresh mint leaves
12 pitted green olives, halved
1/4 large English cucumber, seeded and cut into 1/2" chunks

1. Combine fennel seeds, orange zest and juice, and pepper. Gently stir in the feta and marinate for 1 hour at room temperature or up to 3 hours in the refrigerator. (Marinate overnight to save time.)
2. To assemble: Place 1 mint leaf on a skewer, about 3/4" up; add 1 olive half and 1 cucumber chunk. Place 1 cube of feta on the end. These can be made several hours in advance and stored in the refrigerator until ready to serve. Bring to room temperature before serving. (Serving size: 3 skewers)

Calories 59 (68% from fat); Fat 5 g (sat 2g, mono 2g, poly 0g); cholesterol 13mg; protein 2g; carbohydrate 3g; sugars 1g; fiber 0g; iron 0g; sodium 324mg; calcium 80mg

The salad of the month! I wonder if his parents get a bumper sticker.

Mixed Greens with Goat Cheese

Prep: 15 minutes; cook: 9 minutes
Makes 6 servings

1/2 cup dry breadcrumbs
2 tablespoons lemon zest (about 1 lemon)
1 tablespoon minced fresh parsley
1 garlic clove, chopped
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1 6-oz. package goat cheese, sliced into 1/4" rounds
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon oil, divided
6 ounces gourmet salad greens
1 teaspoon sherry vinegar
1-1/2 cups sliced apples, such as Granny Smith
6 pieces rosemary flatbread

1. Preheat oven to 450°. Combine breadcrumbs and next 5 ingredients in a shallow pan. Place 1 tablespoon of olive oil in a small dish and brush each goat cheese slice with oil. Dredge each slide in breadcrumb mixture and place on a baking sheet leaving 1/2" between slices.
2. Bake for 8-10 minutes. Remove from oven. While the cheese is baking, toss greens with vinegar, apple slices and remaining teaspoon olive oil in a large salad bowl.
3. Transfer to 6 salad plates. Top each plate of salad greens and apples with 2 goat cheese medallions. Serve with flatbread while cheese is warm. (Serving size: 1 ounce greens, 1/4 apple, 2 cheese medallions)

Calories 287 (30% from fat); fat 10g (sat 6g, mono 3g, poly 0g); cholesterol 22mg; protein 12g; carbohydrate 40g; sugars 6g; fiber 4g; iron 3mg; sodium 551mg; calcium 117mg

Whew! That was a lot of typing! I'm tired now. One edition down, approximately 50 to go. Let me know if you try any of the recipes or if you get any lost monies returned to you.

No. No. No.

So I had this customer today who was 85. Actually her age according to her is "going to be 86 in December." I thought only children do that. Anyways. She was very physically feeble, so I helped her out to her car. Yeah, she still drives. That's lovely. Anyways. As I'm helping her shuffle along, she tells me that she's worried about making it home safely and asked me to pray for her. I said okay.

c: Are you a Christian?
T: (make believe I didn't hear)
c: Are you a Christian?
T: No.
c: Muslims aren't so bad. They kill people, but *mumble, mumble* kill people, too. Are you a Muslim?
T: No.
c: Are you Jewish?
T: No.
c: But you said you weren't a Christian.
T: Nope.
(pause)
c: Are you a Unitarian?
T: No.
(long pause)
c: I'll stop asking questions now.
T: Okay.

I'm so confused

On Wednesday, Toast and I are going to New York City where I will be testing for Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. I have to be at the testing site at 4:45 p.m. I have the day off from work and my initial plan was to go down rather early, spend some time gamboling merrily around Central Park, then grab a very early dinner and get to the test with plenty of time to spare. This would entail dressing comfortably for all the walking we'd be doing. However as I was just going through my Zagat for NYC, I found that Jean Georges offers a prix fixe lunch for only $28! Oh my Flying Spaghetti Monster, I could eat at Jean Fucking Georges for only $28! Unimaginable! I'm beside myself! Wow! Geez! Really, just wow!

Alright.

If I were to take advantage of this incredible special, I would have to dress at very least in business casual attire. That would mean no climbing rocks or frolicking in Central Park. I truly don't know what to do. I've never had a block of time during the day in NYC where I could spend some quality time with the Park. I've also never imagined that I'd be able to eat at Jean Georges. I don't know what to do. I'm a foodie and I lurve new restaurant experiences, but I also relish this opportunity to have fun in Central Park like I've never been able to before. Does anybody have any thoughts on this?

A funny little story

I used to live in an old Victorian house that was split into four separate apartments. My neighbor across the hall, Dan, and I used to talk to each other through the walls. One morning I was having breakfast in my kitchen and Dan was out in the hallway doing stuff. I yelled, "Good morning" out to him. He asked what I was doing. I told him I was eating breakfast. He asked what I was having. I told him, "A bowl of Life" to which he replied, "Tracy, you are a bowl of Life." Hence the name of this blog.

Meme #2 - The real reason for this blog

When this meme came out, I was incredibly jealous as it looked like boatloads of fun and I could not partake. Fuck that!

THE PHOTO MEME!

What's your first name?



Minus the Dick, of course.

Where do you live?



What is your relationship status?



What is your favorite color?



Favorite food?



What are you listening to right now?



What is your favorite movie?



Where is your dream vacation?



What are you thinking about right now?



Who is your best friend?



Nickname?



Where do you work?



What (who) makes you laugh?



What are you going to do after this?



How do you feel right now?



What are your plans for the weekend?



What is your favorite thing to do?



What school do did you go to?



What are you addicted to?



What's your best feature?